Not sure why, but every time I drive by Red's Porch, my first thought is a vision in my head of Sam Elliott calmly stating, "I'm Red, and this here is my porch", while welcoming guests with a sweep of the arm and a crooked smile.
My second thought is always, "damnit all does that place ever look like a Citibank".
Well, to those who know, Red's is actually BEHIND the bank. Probably not hard to figure out, but just thought I'd clarify.
As far as atmosphere goes, this place is tops. A two story, indoor-outdoor structure with a fantastic second level bar and porch with an even better view of the canyon-like Greenbelt with a distant view of the hills of Westlake. Put simply, this is a small slice of vacation lake life without the lake. It beats a drive out to Lake Travis when you're just looking for that feeling, some food, and some drinks on a nice day, and want to avoid the crowds and the scantily-but-should-be-clad boaters stopping in for some more beer at Hula Hut or Abel's on the Lake (both great spots though in their own right).
My good friend Spike and I stopped in for a quick burger and beer yesterday after a muni round on a beautiful February day. High hopes for the atmosphere, and tempered hopes of a great burger, we were both pleasantly surprised by all, and had a great time.
I opted for the Manimal, upgraded for grass-fed, natural beef, topped with grilled onions, cheddar, swiss and homemade Thousand Island, and Spike opted for the Smokey Goat burger, topped with "deep" smoked bacon, fried onions, and goat cheese. And then we did what two dudes normally don't do in a public setting, we cut those suckers in half and traded so we could try each of them. In the name of reviewing. Glad we did.
Both very good. The grass-fed natty patty on the Manimal had a rich, moist, and beefy flavor, complemented nicely by sweet, carmelized onions. I'd have liked some more tang from the Thousand Island to balance the onions, as it erred toward the sweet side, though was well prepared and very good.
(picture a half pound burger on a sourdough bun with grilled onion, cheddar, swiss, and 1000 island here)
The Smokey Goat was excellent. Bacon was as advertised and cooked perfectly. Not crumbly and not chewy. Thin sliced and fried onions provided a crunch and sweetness, which balanced perfectly with the soft, tangy goat cheese. Smokey, sweet, salty, tangy, beefy. A great combination of flavor.
Fries came with both, and while not mind blowing, were pretty good. A bit on the cool side, and clearly just fried once, they came well seasoned with flaky kosher salt. Dipped in a self-made-at-the-table hot sauce laced ketchup, or the side of cilantro mayo that I ordered, they rounded out the meal, as did my Austin Beerworks Pearl Snap Pils, which was just one of a large list of local, domestic and import brews available for the taking.
This is a laid back, very Austin, perfect atmosphere, where you can spend countless hours on a nice afternoon drinking beer, a decent glass of wine, or a cocktail, keeping any worries the past week may have brought, or the current week may bring, far, far away.
Sometimes you eat the bar, and...well...sometimes the bar eats you. I'm good with either. And this is the right bar.
Summary
Atmosphere: relaxing lakeside bar just without the lake but fantastic views, laid back, outdoor seating, sit outside
Food: burgers, sandwiches, home-cooking and Tex-Mex. you feel like it, you got it.
Crowd: goooooood looooookin', young, old, beachy, swimsuits, tank tops, bare feet, canine, large groups, small groups, hotchicks, hipsters, and starving artists
When to Go: any afternoon when the weather is nice, brunch on the weekends
What to Order: whatever you feel like, you're there for the the atmosphere, the company, and the beer
Dog Friendly: absolutely, they'll have lots of friends
Let me tell you what Top Notch is packin' right here, alll right...we got a 15-8 piece dark, No. 4 Longhorn Special, curbside service, 6 and 1 fried sides, no-doubt 390 cholesterol...we're talking some f-in' food.
Alright, alright...let's start with the fried chicken this stuff was G-O-O-D good, my man...I'm talkin' super juicy on the inside, ultra crispy on the outside, salty, plump...I don't know what they do to it, man, but they got to keep on doin' it, cause that chicken makes life worth livin', man. L-I-V-I-N.
Sides? Yeah, man, any and all, all right...mashed potatoes and gravy...and this gravy was smokin', man...S-M-O-K-I-N...I'm talkin' thick, creamy, salty, peppery...dropped on top of those fresh-peeled-boiled-and-mashed spuds like a cheerleader on a quarterback, all right...
Fried sides? Can't decide? Get 'em all...you got to eat what Artie Gordo wants to eat. Okra...fries...rings...you got to know they do it right here, man...hot, crunchy, salty...may even sop up a little of that chicken fat in the fryer for a little soul, all right all right...
Burger...grilled over charcoal, man, the only way to do it, alll right...this number four is the 1976 version of the Big Mac, my man, and what Ronald McDonald no-doubt wants that Big Mac to be to-DAY, man...I'm talkin' two charcoal grilled patties...ripe with flavor....melted American cheese, special sauce, lettuce, tomato, onion...this thing is hot, this thing is big, and this thing tastes great...just wish they had crisper lettuce and ripe tomatoes...I'd be a lot cooler if they did...but who cares, I'm not here for a salad.
That's what I love about these drive-ins, man. I get older, they serve the same food...
Off to the Moontower
Atmosphere: old school, mellow, cruise in, drive-in, counter service, indoor seating, sit-in-your-car-and-push-the-button seating, carry-out, throwback, place for a date when you're to young to hit Centennial, THE place to pick up redheads, all right all right
Food: classic man, burgers, fries, rings, fried chicken and fixin's
Dog Friendly: you got to do what you got to do
Crowd: me, Randall Pink Floyd, Slater-son, little Mitch Kramer, and redheads, man, I love those redheads
When to Go: lunch, dinner, anytime you want my man, anytime you want
What to Order: you got to order what you want to order, but get the fried chicken or a number four, all right all right...
Admittedly and regrettably I haven't posted many restaurant reviews lately as I've been cooking at home nearly every night and when I have stopped somewhere for a bite, it's been for the old standbys that I've already written about. That said, let's see if I remember how to do this.
Hank's Garage Belgian Pub
Hank's Garage Belgian Pub
Hanks Garage, Belgian Pub
I know, doesn't really seem to jive, does it. I'm afraid this place is suffering from location and identity issues. I've been wanting to check out this "Belgian Pub" for a while now, and finally made it there last week for a quick dinner and a beer.
I wasn't sure quite what to expect, but was hoping it was along the lines of a place called Vol de Nuit in the West Village of Manhattan, which I visited a few years back. Not having been to Belgium to see what a real Belgian Pub is like, I've got to believe that this is a pretty good replication...
...save for greasy tank tops, of course.
Small, intimate, secluded, dark only for the dimly lit red lights, dusty hardwood floors, fantastic Belgian beers of all sorts on tap, expertly executed fries, and mouthwatering mussels swimming in a flavorful broth.
Instead, we've got this...
...which doesn't look all that bad in these pictures, I realize, but just doesn't have that feel that I so expected and wanted. First off, the place is huge, and with windows across the entire front of the joint, exposed ceilings and concrete floors, an open kitchen, and a menu meant to look like a clipboard list of garage services and estimates, it just doesn't scream PUB at me. Give me dark. Give me scary. Give me food that comes from a mysterious room somewhere off the grid.
If the place isn't packed (and there were two other people there when I was there), sounds quietly echo
through the place, even over the horrific sounds of Brent Musburger ringing out from one of several flat screen TVs around the place. It's identity crisis starts with it trying to decide if it's a restaurant, a pub, or a sports bar, and with a location at Second and San Jacinto downtown, it's more likely to attract name-tagged convention goers than thirsty locals looking for a place to drown the beating of a hard days work in some high-octane beer.
Now, I get that the place has a history, and is in fact a former garage, as the bartenders will clearly point out, but it just doesn't seem to fit with the theme they're going for.
That said...despite the odd format, the menu looked excellent, and I would have had trouble picking out what to eat if not for my craving for fries that lead me there in the first place. Even with that, there are a lot options for fries, starting with regular or duck fat, and then a great list of dipping sauces including garlicky aioli, smoked paprika mayonnaise, dill creme fraiche, Sriracha mayo and Bearnaise. They've also got poutine, a north of the border delicacy known more commonly to American Northeast stoners and ski bums as french fries and gravy, which caught my attention quickly. They have a few different kinds, but I went with the classic, with brown sauce and cheese curds, and for no extra charge I added a side of smoked paprika mayonnaise.
Awesome. It was awesome.
Fries leaning toward the soggy side, a combination of cooking technique and gravy, without being greasy, a flavorful gravy, chewy cheese curds, and a wonderfully flavored dipping sauce.
I paired it with a Duchess de Bourge ale, which was the closest they could come to a sour beer I was looking for, and though a little on the sweet side for my taste, it was very good and went perfectly with the fries. I'd have liked to see a little more Belgian oriented beer selection, but I do realize this is Texas, so to survive they must have the basics. It was a little disheartening though to see Coors and Coors light at the top of the draught menu, and only after twenty beers ranging the gambit from American mass-produced to widely-distributed microbrews to German, Scottish and Irish lagers did they get to nine Belgians that they feature, half of which are made on this side of the Atlantic. That said, there's a taste on there for everyone, so if you're with a group looking for fries and beer, this is a good spot.
And it's a spot that I'll go back to. For the fries, a great beer, and Brent Musburger's opinion on whatever it is he feels like talking about, God help us all.
Summary:
Atmosphere: confused, sports barry, a little sterile, good for groups
Food: Belgian influenced, fries, mussels, burgers, sandwiches, and meat dishes
Crowd: two old guys in starched shirts (on my visit there)
Dog Friendly: no
When to Go: happy hour, dinner
What to Order for the First Timer: Classic Poutine with Smoked Paprika Mayonnaise
Walked down to Counter Cafe this morning with the intent of getting breakfast tacos, one of the two breakfasts I tend to rotate between when I go, but after a quick discussion with my waitress, I decided to go with the special of the day, two sausage, egg, and cheese sandwiches on homemade biscuits.
Glad I did. Great batch of sausage today. Very fresh, cooked medium well, heavy on the sage and red pepper, giving it immense flavor and kick. Topped off with a over-medium egg and shredded cheddar.
Full reviews here, just wanted to share today's special with you...
Thought I'd share yesterday's photo from Dirty's since the lighting was better in the front room.
Went with the large cheeseburger, two patties with cheese between them, onion, tomato, pickle and mayo. Caught them on a good day too, the bun had just enough grease seep into it to be really good, but wasn't supersaturated as happens sometime.
For the full review, http://thefatartery.blogspot.com/2011/03/dirty-martins-austin-tx.html
Yeah, Google Serranos and this is the first image that comes up. Relation to the chile or restaurant? I have no idea.
Now, I did find myself fascinated by this not-so-Mike-and-Carol family upon seeing this. A true pioneer, sometime in the late 60s, this not-Mike managed to piece together a little slice of Mexico, an FLDS third-wife, a scary little future serial killer, and enough butterfly collars and bad haircuts to fill his little California bungalow and make a pitch to the networks.
Thankfully, ABC didn't pick it up.
And thankfully, these people weren't at Serrano's on Red River when I went there for fajitas on Tuesday night.
There was however, a drunk man in his 60s that sat down next to me who, after offering the bartender extra money to make his margarita not sweet, asked me if I wanted to share enchiladas with him, to which I politely declined indicating that I had already ordered.
Ok, let's back up a minute. Found myself craving some fajitas the other night, and after driving by the packed parking lot at Polvo's, decided I'd try somewhere I hadn't been before. Advertising itself as the home of Mesquite Grilled Fajitas, I decided to give Serrano's a shot, despite a misguided preconceived notion that this place was run-of-the-mill and probably not very good. Now I've driven by the downtown location countless times, and always chalked it up as being one of those cool little spots with average food, that likely gets visitors more than locals, and might be a good spot for a bite and some margaritas, but not a place someone looking for great food would go.
Despite the downtown location, I was able to park right out front, and after helping a group of six ladies to understand that the reason the parking meter wasn't working was because it shut off two hours earlier, I ambled up the Austin stacked stone stairway, across the "amphitheater", where the Brady's or not-so-Brady's could play if the every did come, to the bar, where I ordered a margarita, chips and queso, and beef fajitas.
This is actually a cool little spot, which, on a day that's not 105 would be a nice setting to sit outside, particularly if they filled the little stone stage along the creek that flows through the place with mariachis.
So as I mentioned, I started with the chips and queso, which came out quickly and hot, thankfully, as it's congealation factor was an eight on the standard ten point scale. Not spicy, but flavorful and creamy, this was a perfect starter, but the real winner was the salsa. Red and chunky, almost a blend between fresh pico and standard salsa, it carried some serious heat, which I welcomed, and was also cool and refreshing.
I can't speak for the rest of the food there, but the fajitas hit the spot. Upon their arrival, I was disappointed that, though served on an iron platter, they weren't sizzling, there was just a lone serrano pepper, and the onions looked raw, lacking that caramelization and continued cooking that I love so much. The beef itself was lukewarm, and cooked medium to medium-well, but had great flavor. Not so much the flavor of the heavily seasoned Polvo's meat, but more along the lines of the nice grill-flavored Habanero Cafe cuts. Tortillas were clearly homemade, thin flour tortillas that were nearly see through and which were easily the hottest thing on the plate, which did well in transferring the refried beans, beef, onions, sour cream and pico de gallo from the plate to my mouth. All in all, these were very good, including the onions, and the place gets bonus points for being and easy-in, easy-out fajita fix.
Nothing to write home about on the sides, standard rice, which I had a bite of but no more, and pureed refried pintos, carrying an oxygen-affected crust on the top.
Summary
Atmosphere: old Austin, ample outdoor seating in a cool old setting, bar, good place to meet for a drink and a bite, good place for a group, decent place to sit and have a solo meal
Food: Tex-Mex
Crowd: drunk old man, family who demanded the Food Network be turned on minutes before leaving, couples, and families
The famous In-N-Out Burger is making its way to Texas, but I don't really care, because in Austin, we've got P Terry's, a quintessential coastal California-style drive-thru burger joint serving up burgers and fries similar too, but perhaps even better than those at the noted California chain. I'll wait for a side by side for final judgment, but know that it has got to be close.
P Terry's has a few locations in Austin, but the one that I am familiar with a frequent pretty regularly is the one just south of Town Lake on South Lamar. A true drive-thru, this place is slightly larger than a breadbox, with windows on either side, one for conducting business, and one for receiving morsels of goodness wedged in a bun. The walk up business is great too, with a small, almost hidden outdoor seating area, which might be alright on a nice day, but you're not going to see me there in the heat of summer.
Saturday I arrived shortly after noon and was behind eight to ten cars, but it took less than fifteen minutes to get my food and be on my way. Shockingly, in that span I heard Florence and the Machine's Dog Days are Over on the radio not once, but twice (different stations at least).
Anyway, not a lot to choose from here, but that's just fine with me, it means they do what they do well, and they get it done quick. Burger, double, with cheese or without, or a veggie burger. Fries. Standards included, crisp iceberg lettuce, local organic tomatoes, and their special sauce, an In-N-Out like version of Thousand Island, which is incredible.
I chose the double, and added onions, which I strongly recommend.
So these burgers aren't big, so I do recommend a double, both for filling you up and also, it's the absolute perfect meat to bread ratio. These are thin patties, and the kind that nearly melt together, the same consistency throughout, made of fresh local, grass-fed beef, with great flavor and juiciness...like In-N-Out, fresh, never frozen. The cheese is high quality Processed In The USA variety that envelops the meat but seems to know to stop short of wilting the vegetables. Tomatoes are advertised as local and organic, and I'm fairly certain if they contained any bit of green or yellow, you wouldn't see them on your sandwich. Lettuce is the thick, hand torn from the head kind, which remarkably retains its crispness and temperature on the way home despite being wrapped in wax paper with the hot meat and cheese. Onions. Wow, the onions are great, and I urge you to add them to your burger. Chopped white onions. Crisp. Cold. Pungent. Lend incredible texture and flavor to an incredible sandwich.
On to the fries. Again like In-N-Out, cut fresh on site. Know how I know?
Oh, and they are DE-LISH. That's right.
So these have a nice, fresh flavor and are cooked to order and served piping hot and lightly salted. They're of the soggy, but not too much, variety, lacking the outside crispiness but making up for it in flavor.
Good stuff. This is a weekend spot for sure. Only thing missing is hitting the beach right afterwards. But wait, there's Barton Springs...even better. Finish off your fattening with a refreshing dip in the natural spring, and as you're FLOATING on the top of the crystal clear water, be sure to thank P Terry for the start to a great Saturday.
Great seafood. Great raw bar. Great bar. Great cocktails. Great outdoor seating. Great place for dinner.
Now, with a thesaurus...
Great seafood. Splendiferous raw bar. Swell bar. Hunky-dory cocktails. Marvelous outdoor seating. Fabulous place for dinner.
In the second half of 2010 (2H2010 for you corporate folks) when I was commuting to Austin weekly and staying with friends down off of South Congress, I frequented this place for dinner quite a bit whenever I was feeling like seafood or a relatively healthy meal. Also, it's a fantastic place to have a solo dinner, with a spacious bar, knowledgeable bartenders, and other solo diners sitting at the bar ready to have a conversation.
The menu is huge, comprised almost entirely of seafood, split up into sections for the raw bar, which features no less than twelve different types of oysters on the half shell, appetizers, salads and soups, simple a la carte fish, seafood and non-seafood plates, sandwiches, and sides. The bartenders and waiters can tell you anything and everything about everything on the menu, and can help to get you the right meal for you.
My Lovely Wife Mrs. Gordo and I hit up Perla's for an early dinner last night for some drinks and some food to share, which is a great way to experience this place as it allows you to try several things. We arrived right around 5:30pm, which was clearly too late to get a table outside on this fantastic day, but in time to get $0.50 off oysters (each one) and some discounted drinks at their happy hour. I'd say there are twenty or more tables outside underneath the shade of awnings and a massive oak, and in addition is an outdoor "bar" to sit at, not an actual bar but a long, skinny concrete table which is perfect for bellying up, be you flying solo or on a date. So with the outside packed, we found two spots at the bar inside, which is my favorite place to sit for a meal here.
We started with some oysters on the half shell, and after talking with the bartender about the various oysters on the menu, decided on the Salutation Cove Oysters from Prince Edward Island. Shucked at the bar and served on a bed of crushed ice with a couple of lemon wedges, these were medium sized, slightly briny though not as salty as those from the northeast, and very good. They serve them with sides of cocktail sauce, horseradish, and vinegar/onion mignonette, all perfect complements and perfect acidity to cut through the oysters.
From the oysters we moved on to the Salt and Jalapeno Pepper Fried Calamari with Green Sauce and Marinara, which is one of the better renditions of fried calamari I've had. Not greasy at all, the rings and tentacles come out dry and crispy on the outside, plump and perfectly tender on the inside, and are mixed together with fried strips of mild peppers and okra. Both sauces are excellent, with the green sauce being a simple, smooth and creamy salsa verde with an adequate amount of heat, and the marinara being homemade with chunks of tomato and onion, served warm.
Our raw and deep fried boxes checked, we moved over to the Fresh & Simple Market Seafood section and debated between the steamed North Atlantic halibut, the pan roasted Texas coast grouper, and halibut cheeks, which were littered amongst eight to ten other simply prepared fish selections. Just for the halibut, we went for the halibut cheeks with a side of potato griddle cakes.
Let me start with the griddle cakes. These things are fantastic. Very thinly shredded potatoes, presumably with egg, cream, and mild seasoning, formed into one inch thick patties and fried before being topped with sour cream and chives. Crispy on the outside, creamy on the inside with just a hint of tooth from the potatoes. I strongly recommend this as a side to whatever you're having.
On to the halibut, and first an educations. These beauties are halibut cheeks:
They cut them out of this ugly sucker, pan roast these delicate morsels, resulting in a paper-thin, lightly browned and crispy crust, and a tender, mildly flavored, and incredibly delicate interior. With these simple preparations, you get a broiled lemon for squeezing, an herbed breadcrumb stuffed roma tomato, and a choice of garlic drawn butter, salsa verde, red chimichurri or homemade tartar as a sauce. I highly recommend the red chimichurri, a take on the standard South American condiment based on oil, herbs and garlic, with this one adding what tasted like oven dried tomatoes, lending a great sweetness to the dish. It's incredible, and a perfect sauce for the fish, though it can stand on its own just fine.
As I have a tendency to do, I'm going to digress. I've had fat cheeks my whole life. Growing up I was sent to the principal's office on more than one occasion for dipping in class, which I wasn't. I've been asked by cigar store employees what brand I'm chewing, which I also wasn't. But my favorite story comes after a late night of drinking, and a even later night of food poisoning. We had this tiny diner that we'd go to after the bars in school called the Pitt Grill, next to the Days Inn (that reminds me, what does La Quinta mean in English? mull it over, we'll get back to it), which was run by a massive and generally angry lady who would let us get behind the counter and do what we pleased with the griddle, the stove, the deep fryer and the toaster, leading us to some awesome late night meals and second degree burns before turning in for the night. On one such occasion they had just gotten in a batch of spoiled eggs, which we only found out a few hours later when my roommate and I both woke up in cold sweats with our bodies doing everything in their power to expel the tainted goods. After spending most of the night on the bathroom floor waiting for the health center to open up, we finally made it over to see the doctor. While my roommate vomited continuously in the waiting area, I went in to see the doctor, an old army doctor who must of at some point taken some shrapnel to the head, and explained what happened, citing specifically the undercooked and underrefrigerated eggs, my symptoms as well as my roommates, and that I've had food poisoning before. After a careful study of my body and head, this genius put his hand to his chin and this thinking cap on, thought about it for two or three minutes before informing me that nope, I didn't have food poisoning, I had a full on case of the mumps.
"Are you kidding me?" I asked. "Why the hell do you think I have the mumps? My roommate ate the same thing as me last night and is out in the hall vomiting right now."
His answer was simple. "Your cheeks have very serious swelling."
(I digress from my digression here. Answer: nexttodennys. YEAH! I'll be here all week, folks.)
Anyway I asked for a mirror, took a look at him, and informed him that's how I looked every morning when I wake up and look in the mirror, but he didn't believe me and asked if he could call my roommate in from the hallway to attest, which he did. As soon as he asked the question about my cheeks, my roommate looked at me as if to say, "is this guy for real", then vomited in the trash can he brought in with him from the hallway, then said "yeah, his cheeks look like that all the time", and then vomited again.
What could the doctor do at that point but offer a second opinion? "OK, you have food poisoning."
Thanks. True story. Don't get me started on health care overhaul.
Anyway, all that said, here's my best halibut impression.
Did that ruin your day?
Summary
Atmosphere: casual/trendy fish house and raw bar, great bar to sit at, great cocktails, great people watching, great if you're flying solo, fantastic outdoor seating and lots of it, outdoor "bar" to sit at, great place for a date, great place for a group
Food: seafood, some of the very best in town
Dog Friendly: indeed
When to Go: happy hour, dinner
Crowd: businessmen, 20somethings, 30somethings, tourists, hotchicks, groups of girls, groups of guys, groups of girls and guys, scantily clads, solo diners, seafood lovers
What to Order for the First Timer: oysters on the half shell, whatever pan roasted white fish they have with red chimichurri, griddle cakes
