Red's Porch - Austin, TX

Not sure why, but every time I drive by Red's Porch, my first thought is a vision in my head of Sam Elliott calmly stating, "I'm Red, and this here is my porch", while welcoming guests with a sweep of the arm and a crooked smile.

My second thought is always, "damnit all does that place ever look like a Citibank".

Well, to those who know, Red's is actually BEHIND the bank.  Probably not hard to figure out, but just thought I'd clarify.

As far as atmosphere goes, this place is tops.  A two story, indoor-outdoor structure with a fantastic second level bar and porch with an even better view of the canyon-like Greenbelt with a distant view of the hills of Westlake.  Put simply, this is a small slice of vacation lake life without the lake.  It beats a drive out to Lake Travis when you're just looking for that feeling, some food, and some drinks on a nice day, and want to avoid the crowds and the scantily-but-should-be-clad boaters stopping in for some more beer at Hula Hut or Abel's on the Lake (both great spots though in their own right).  

My good friend Spike and I stopped in for a quick burger and beer yesterday after a muni round on a beautiful February day.  High hopes for the atmosphere, and tempered hopes of a great burger, we were both pleasantly surprised by all, and had a great time.

I opted for the Manimal, upgraded for grass-fed, natural beef, topped with grilled onions, cheddar, swiss and homemade Thousand Island, and Spike opted for the Smokey Goat burger, topped with "deep" smoked bacon, fried onions, and goat cheese.  And then we did what two dudes normally don't do in a public setting, we cut those suckers in half and traded so we could try each of them.  In the name of reviewing.  Glad we did.

Both very good.  The grass-fed natty patty on the Manimal had a rich, moist, and beefy flavor, complemented nicely by sweet, carmelized onions.  I'd have liked some more tang from the Thousand Island to balance the onions, as it erred toward the sweet side, though was well prepared and very good.

(picture a half pound burger on a sourdough bun with grilled onion, cheddar, swiss, and 1000 island here)

The Smokey Goat was excellent.  Bacon was as advertised and cooked perfectly.  Not crumbly and not chewy.  Thin sliced and fried onions provided a crunch and sweetness, which balanced perfectly with the soft, tangy goat cheese.  Smokey, sweet, salty, tangy, beefy.  A great combination of flavor.

Fries came with both, and while not mind blowing, were pretty good.  A bit on the cool side, and clearly just fried once, they came well seasoned with flaky kosher salt.  Dipped in a self-made-at-the-table hot sauce laced ketchup, or the side of cilantro mayo that I ordered, they rounded out the meal, as did my Austin Beerworks Pearl Snap Pils, which was just one of a large list of local, domestic and import brews available for the taking.

This is a laid back, very Austin, perfect atmosphere, where you can spend countless hours on a nice afternoon drinking beer, a decent glass of wine, or a cocktail, keeping any worries the past week may have brought, or the current week may bring, far, far away.

Sometimes you eat the bar, and...well...sometimes the bar eats you.  I'm good with either.  And this is the right bar.

Summary

Atmosphere:  relaxing lakeside bar just without the lake but fantastic views, laid back, outdoor seating, sit outside

Food:  burgers, sandwiches, home-cooking and Tex-Mex. you feel like it, you got it.

Crowd:  goooooood looooookin', young, old, beachy, swimsuits, tank tops, bare feet, canine, large groups, small groups, hotchicks, hipsters, and starving artists

When to Go:  any afternoon when the weather is nice, brunch on the weekends

What to Order:  whatever you feel like, you're there for the the atmosphere, the company, and the beer

Dog Friendly:  absolutely, they'll have lots of friends

JMueller's BBQ - Austin, TX

The apple fell 37.7 miles from the tree, which given the 24,900 mile circumference of the the blue planet, equates to 0.1526% of the farthest it could have fallen.  

THAT, my friends,

is called a rounding error.

He done good.

Backstory:  trailer off South First opened by a member of the legendary Mueller family out of Taylor, the pioneers and operators of my second favorite barbecue joint in the state (technically, it bounces between one and two but its sitting at two now, not because of a subpar experience, but because my last meal was at number one)

Anyway, this place is G - O - O - D FANTASTIC.

Notice the handwritten menus with items crossed out.  That was at 12:30, so get there early.

Here's how I ordered.

"Give me a little of everything you've got left, some chipotle cole slaw, some cheese, a jalapeno, and some potato salad."

And here is what I received:

Brisket.

BAM!

Pork ribs.

BAM!

Sausage.

BAM!

Beef Rib.

HOT DAMN!!!

Winner winner chicken dinner.  Axe the bird and fly with the cow.  

So, I don't want to ruin how good this was with words, so I'll be brief.

Get the beef rib.  Period.

It's incredible.  Thick, coarse ground salt and pepper crust makes for an incredible bark, while the bone and the fat inside keep the meat as tender as it could possibly be.  My brisket was comparable, I lucked out and got the fatty cuts, which I prefer, but if you're going to go one or the other, my guess is the beef rib is going to have more consistency.  Do NOT, under any circumstance order your brisket lean.  Here or anywhere.

Pearl of wisdom coming....wait for it.......wait for it............



Life's too short for lean meats and light beer.



Pork ribs are great, sausage also good.  Do yourself a favor and get a chunk of cheddar cheese and some saltines and make yourself a little sausage cheese appetizer.

Sides were great, but come for the meat.  They give you sauce, but just think of it as a "thank you for dining with us" after dinner mint type thing.  Not that it's bad, it's not, but it isn't what this barbecue is about.

I'd be hard pressed to find better barbecue.


Summary

Atmosphere:  food truck with a bigolesmoker out back, plenty of outdoor seating some with umbrellas for shade, great for lunch on a nice day, great for bbq any day

Food:  Texas barbecue

Dog Friendly:  yep

Crowd:  country folk, hipsters, business casual crowd, students, you name it they're there

When to Go:  lunch, get there early

What to Order:  beef rib (short rib)

Texas Honey Ham Company - Austin, TX

Texas Honey Ham.................YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAWWWWWW!

Reviewed this one already...

http://thefatartery.blogspot.com/2011/11/texas-honey-ham-company.html

...but stopped in for breakfast yesterday after hearing their breakfast tacos were no joke.

Their breakfast tacos were no joke.

Sausage and egg, bacon and egg, baked potato hash and egg, and ham, egg and serranos.

All were very good...but let me sidestep here and say that just watching the guy working the morning shift on the flattop yesterday was like watching an artist with a canvas.  Eggs handled right hand only...crack, split, tossed...yes tossed (his range was about two and half feet) to the appropriate part of the griddle in the same swoop that delivered the shell to the trash.  His work with the spatulas (two of them simultaneously) puts him one rice volcano and a shrimp flip shy of the great Benny Hanna, and has me thinking his chopstick skills might rival Miyagi.

That said, back to the tacos.  All were good, the eggs being that half scrambled variety that though properly chopped together with the rest of the ingredients, leave you with a few really nice yolk bites and some texture.  The meat, all good, though there is no chorizo on the menu and the sausage, while nice, was fairly bland.  Ham was their signature ham, nicely chunked and sweet and salty at the same time.  Bacon, not over crisp, but not chewy.  Perfect consistency to be cut into the egg.  Potatoes were a nice change from a hash brown, darker in color and a little deeper in flavor, though I couldn't exactly put my finger on what they had done to them.  Tortillas were soft, and nicely wrapped in foil perfect for eating in the car if you needed to, and the salsa was homemade and fresh, on the mild side, but perfectly complementary of the tacos, not overpowering in flavor nor heat.  My recommendation if you're into heat in the morning is to adjust it using peppers.  Mild:  just use the salsa.  Medium:  get fresh jalapenos cut into your taco.  Hot:  same but with the serranos.  Just enough heat to make it hum, but not enough to cause you to turn back around on your way to work.

So, my order of preference of these things:

1.  Ham, egg, serrano
2.  Bacon and egg
3.  Baked potato hash and egg
4.  Sausage and egg

Alphabetical order of these things:

1.  Bacon and egg
2.  Baked potato hash and egg
3.  Ham, egg, serrano
4.  Sausage and egg

Front to back on the pig:

1.  Baked potato hash and egg (they'll eat anything, and trust me you want the way in, not out)
2.  Sausage and egg
3.  Bacon and egg
4.  Ham and egg

Right aligned, reverse alphabetical by ninth to last character, spaces being before A and punctuation being after Z:

1.  Ham, egg, serrano

2.  Bacon and egg

3.  Baked potato hash and egg

4.  Sausage and egg

Now, all that said, this is a mix and match place.   I'm a heat and freshness guy, so will opt for the serranos on whatever I get next, and though I do love the front part of the pig, I'll probably pass on the sausage and stick to ham and bacon.

Maybe I'll add some cheese to complete the trifecta...

Summary:

Check out the prior review.

Way South Philly - Austin, TX

A few days ago I reviewed the cheesesteak at Delaware Sub Shop with a theme based on Always Sunny in Philadelphia, both of which I am a big fan of.  I thought it was a good cheesesteak, the best I'd had in Texas in fact, which was true as of a few days ago, but which is very, very wrong today after a trip to Way South Philly.

I was naive.

I was blind.

Blinded by a two year absence from the City of Brotherly Love.

So first and foremost, to Charlie, to Mac, to Dennis, and of course to Sweet Dee (not so much you, Frank, you are a dirty, dirty little man), I AM SORRY.  You all have my sincerest apology in associating you with a sandwich, that while good, and while a cheesesteak, is not worthy of being a PHILLY cheesesteak.

Way South Philly, now THAT is what a Philly cheesesteak is supposed to taste like.   THAT is a Philly cheesesteak.

Delaware, I salute you for trying, and for making a good sandwich, but most of all for stimulating my appetite for a cheesesteak and getting me out there in search of Austin's best.  And as of right now, that Belt lies firmly around the bloated waist of a little trailer out on East 6th, Way South Philly.

For starters, the guy who runs the place is a Philadelphia transplant, hailing from just across the river in south Jersey.  And he's got a resume.  First off, his favorite steak joint in Philadelphia is Jim's, which is legit, less known to tourists, and a favorite of many locals.  Two, he's a good family friend of the folks who make arguably the best roast beef sandwich in the city, Tommy DeNic's at the Reading Terminal Market.  C.) when I started a conversation about pork roll, not only did he know what I was talking about, but he told me that he had some, having just brought it back with him from a recent trip.

So, enough about the man, let's talk about the sandwiches.  Proudly displayed on the side of the trailer is a sign stating that they serve their sandwiches on real Amoroso rolls, straight from Philadelphia, and the only roll that a Philadelphian will accept.  And they are every bit of it.  Buttery, light, soft, and toasty, these things hold that greasy, cheesy goodness more snuggly than a McPoyle holds his milk.

And the cheese.  First thing you see when you peer in the window is this...

Yep.  Wiz.  The real deal.

So, there are several combinations of cheesesteaks here that all looked incredible, but for comparison's sake, I settled on...

THE PAULIE

paul•ie  |ˈpôlē| - adjective – 1. Rocky Balboa’s brother-in-law : Paulie, it’s Thanksgiving, I got a turkey in the oven.  2.  a generous portion of seasoned grilled philly steak, sautéed with steamed onions and mushrooms, then topped with Cheez Wiz : Yeah, I’ll have the Paulie, wit wiz.

Two words:  incredible

Seriously, this thing was perfect.  You know the saying, the whole is greater than the sum of its parts?   Well, it applies to cheesesteaks.  That's for damn sure.  When all of those ingredients are put together on the flat top, and their juices and flavors combine, they become something much, much more.  The flavors change.  They become one.  It.  Becomes one.  It.  Becomes a cheesesteak.

I'm going to offer a comparison here for those who may not have had a real cheesesteak, but may have had one of these.  White Castle.  And I mean no disrespect to Philadelphia, I'm not comparing a White Castle to a great cheesesteak, this is purely illustrative.  Try to make a slider at home.  Good, right?  Now go to White Castle and get the real deal.  See the difference?  You can't find the lines between bun, onion, meat, cheese and bun, nor can you taste any individual ingredient.  It has become one soft, oniony mess, with a flavor all it's own.  And that's what you get with a good steak sandwich, and that's what you get at Way South Philly.  He nailed it.

Oh, before I finish up.  Tots.  Wiz.

Yup.

I think the picture says it all.

Summary

Atmosphere:  food truck, outdoor seating, smoking section, perfect for lunch, carry out

Food:  real deal Philly cheesesteaks

Crowd:  not-so-tough guys, guy in a tie, lady smoking a cigarette and drinking a Dr. Pepper, looked a little like Mac's mom

Dog Friendly:  yes

What to Order for the First Timer:  The Paulie

Best Time to Go:  lunch on a nice day, after the bars on a weekend

Torchy's Tacos - Austin, TX

Torchy's Tacos has a following like no other taco place in Austin, or Texas for that matter, stemming from a loyal student base in search of great food on the cheap.   It's this following that has allowed Torchy's to aggressively expand, from it's start as one of Austin's premier trailers, to numerous brick and mortar locations around Austin, and now...GASP!...Dallas.

I've been a fan of Torchy's since my first visit, and unless I'm in a rush and passing by a location, I like to head down to it's humble beginnings, in the trailer park of South 1st, one of the nicest and easiest in town.

Now, first things first.  Let's boil down what kind of "Mexican" we're talking about here, an important first step for anyone looking for "Mexican" food in Austin.  I've drawn up a little organizational chart here, focusing on the taco side of the equation.

First things first, let's differentiate between Mexican and Tacos.  If you're "going out for Mexican", you're talking about more of a full meal, ranging from something like Taco Cabana to Maudie's to Fonda San Miguel.  Varying degrees of quality, options including enchiladas, burritos, plates, rice, beans, and also different styles such as Interior Mexican, Tex-Mex, or Coastal Mexican.  Now, tacos may very well be a part of your Mexican meal, and that's alright.  For instance, I ate at Maudie's last night.  We "went out for Mexican" and in this instance, Tex-Mex.  I had a combination plate featuring among other things, a crispy beef taco.  But we didn't "go out for tacos", like we did Saturday, when we hit up Torchy's, meaning we were heading somewhere specializing primarily in tacos, though most will likely feature things like chips, salsas, queso, and in the case of some of the authentic Mexican places, tortas...the Mexican sandwich.  That said, generally you're talking about a quicker, more on-the-go meal, something you might associate more with lunch, carry-out, or late-night.

Alright, now that we've got that out of the way, let's briefly touch what I view as this area's primary taco types.

Mexican Street Tacos:  these are the more authentic Mexican tacos, ranging from the more normal classic recipes for al pastor (pork), picadillo (ground beef), and bistec (steak), to the scary...lengua (cow tongue), tripas (small intestine), cabeza (cow face)...and always served on small, usually corn, tortillas with minimal accompaniments, typically cilantro, onion and lime, and your choice of red or green salsa.

Tex-Mex:  think back to taco day at your elementary school growing up, and you've got it, and if your school didn't have taco day, God help you, then drive through Taco Bell and take a look at the menu.  Crispy corn taco shells or soft flour tortillas, seasoned ground beef or shredded chicken, beef or chicken fajita, you got it.  Cheese is typically a component of these tacos, as well as some combination of lettuce, onion, tomato, and salsa.

Fusion:  we're seeing these in the taco trucks quite a bit around here...Korean, Vietnamese, Barbecue, Southern...any kind of non-Mexican food prepared in a tortilla, typically with some sort of meat or vegetable base, cooked, and then any sort of toppings depending on the style...kimchee, slaw, carrots, greens...you name it.   REALLY good.  Not Mexican.

Breakfast:  the pride of Austin, with everyone and their brother, mother, grandmother and everyother making them...I mean come on you can go to Dan's Hamburgers in the morning and get breakfast tacos.  Sounds like a Mexican breakfast joint, doesn't it?  Anyway, you know the drill here, basically corn or flour tortillas, base of eggs, and any assortment and combination of meat, beans, vegetables, tortilla chips, herbs, etc.  Basically, its how you need to start your day.

And there you have it.  Sorry to have digressed.

Alright, so then back to Torchy's.  From a classification standpoint, I'm going to consider Torchy's a Tex-Mex Fusion with side of Breakfast and just a spritz of Street.

Chemically,

 S-Tm – F (B)-S

So I got an assortment to bring back to the house on Saturday for My Lovely Wife Mrs. Gordo and me to share.  First off, they traveled well, due to care in preparation.  Salsas, specific to each taco, are left off of the taco and served in little containers, keeping liquid from gumming up the tortilla.  They're also wrapped tightly in foil, giving juice from the meat little room to squeeze out to the outside of the tortilla.  So, I got all of ours on flour and cut them in half upon arrival for your viewing pleasure.

From left to right:  Ranch Hand, Crossroads, Trailer Park, and Dirty Sanchez.

The Ranch Hand was my least favorite of the four, but not because of failed preparation or a bad mix of ingredients...it was just ordinary, lacking the creativity, flair and flavor that the others celebrated.  Don't get me wrong, this is a good taco, and though not in the breakfast portion of the menu, is basically a steak breakfast taco.  Ample, fluffy scrambled eggs, grilled beef fajita, and shredded cheese, served with their homemade Diablo Sauce, which is basically kind of a creamy fire-roasted habanero sauce, which is quite excellent.  Frankly with the tiny amount of beef featured on this taco, it provided all of the flavor, which was great, but pretty basic.

From here on out it gets a bit more difficult to rank them, as each is very different, very good, very innovative, and any one of them could be your favorite based on what you're feeling like the day you're there.  So let's move to the Crossroads.  Smoked beef brisket with grilled onions, jalapenos, cilantro, jack cheese, and a slice of avocado served with tomatillo sauce.  WELL DONE, TORCHY'S!  What I really like about this is that it's a brisket taco with a great charred and smoky flavor, complemented with sweet grilled onions and the crisp bite of jalapenos and cilantro.  The intentionally acidic tomatillo salsa is a perfect match for this one, with it's vinegary bite and heat cutting through the smoke and tender juiciness of the meat.

Trailer Park.  BAM!  I resisted the temptation to go trashy on this one, replacing the lettuce with queso,  though I'm not sure that really makes it all that much healthier.  Either way, this one is GOOD.  Fried chicken, green chilies, lettuce, pico de gallo and cheese with poblano sauce, an almost jalapeno/poblano infused ranch dressing which is fantastic, and goes really well with this one...think chicken fingers and ranch.  Yep.  The chicken is hot, juicy and crunchy, and the lettuce and pico provide both a temperature contrast and a cool crispness that make this thing perfect.

Dirty Sanchez, also incredibly good, might be my favorite of the four, but I think it's going to depend on the day.  Ready?  Scrambled eggs, a breaded and fried poblano chile, guacamole, escabeche (pickled jalapenos and carrots), and shredded cheese with that same poblano sauce.  Again, think about anything fried...mushrooms, pickles, onions, potatoes, jalapenos...that you like to dip in ranch, and that's what you've got on a tortilla here with non-intrusive scrambled egg providing the body.

Summary

Atmosphere:  covered and uncovered picnic seating in a shaded trailer park, food truck, great place on a nice day for lunch, BYOB

Food:  Tacos

Crowd:  a little bit of everyone

Dog Friendly:  Yes

Best Time to Go:  lunch on a nice day

What to Order for the First Timer:  Trashy Trailer Park, Dirty Sanchez

Dirty Martin's - Austin, TX

I'll let my previous postings on Dirty's speak for the place itself, but must post this to say that Dirty's has the best Chicken Fried Steak Sandwich in Austin.

For years I've stuck to the burgers and sirloin sandwich, which I believe are the best in town, but the other day I decided to stray from my normal orders and give the chicken fried steak a shot.  Wow.  Homemade and deep fried, this sandwich was the perfect blend of tender and crisp, with a great black pepper flavor, just the right amount of grease, a soft bun, and crisp iceberg lettuce and a cool, ripe tomato and mayo to balance it all out.  If you're in the market for one, hit up Dirty's.

Summary

http://thefatartery.blogspot.com/2011/03/dirty-martins-austin-tx.html

Texas Honey Ham Company

Do you ever long for those leftover ham sandwiches in the weeks following Easter and Christmas, but find that fifty weeks out of the year don't have a religious holiday that justifies you cooking four times the quantity of food that any normal person should?

Then folks, Texas Honey Ham Company is for you.

I know, I know, this place is a little flashy for a sandwich shop, but try to see through all the pomp and circumstance and see that this place is THE place to go for a hand-carved sandwich that makes you feel like you're in the comfort of your childhood home.

Several different sandwich options here, based mainly on ham and turkey, and I opted for their signature sandwich, The Choice Slice Sandwich.

A third of a pound of carved, cooked ham, cheddar cheese, lettuce, tomato, red onion, dirty mustard, and mayo on a toasted fresh baked bun.  Wow, this was great.  The ham tasted just like a holiday ham cut right from the bone, tender and juicy, the lettuce and onion provided a crisp crunch, and the sweet-side mustard brought it all together on a really, really good, soft bun.

The baked potato casserole you see to the side of it I could do without on my next trip.  Really nothing more than lumpy mashed red potatoes with nearly undetectable traces of bacon and onion.  Remember though, you're here for the sandwich.  Get some chips.

Summary

Atmosphere:  homey, neighborhoody, great for a lunch meeting, family friendly, carryout

Food:  ham and turkey sandwiches, soups and salads

Crowd:  families, neighbors, hotmoms, businessmen

Dog Friendly:  yes, at a few outside tables

When to Go:  lunch

What to Order for the First Timer:  The Choice Slice Sandwich or the Club

Counter Cafe - Austin, TX

Walked down to Counter Cafe this morning with the intent of getting breakfast tacos, one of the two breakfasts I tend to rotate between when I go, but after a quick discussion with my waitress, I decided to go with the special of the day, two sausage, egg, and cheese sandwiches on homemade biscuits.

Glad I did.  Great batch of sausage today.  Very fresh, cooked medium well, heavy on the sage and red pepper, giving it immense flavor and kick.  Topped off with a over-medium egg and shredded cheddar.

Full reviews here, just wanted to share today's special with you...

http://thefatartery.blogspot.com/2011/02/counter-cafe-austin-tx.html

http://thefatartery.blogspot.com/2011/02/counter-cafe-austin-tx_27.html

http://thefatartery.blogspot.com/2011/03/counter-cafe-austin-tx.html

Dirty Martin's - Austin, TX

Thought I'd share yesterday's photo from Dirty's since the lighting was better in the front room.  

Went with the large cheeseburger, two patties with cheese between them, onion, tomato, pickle and mayo.  Caught them on a good day too, the bun had just enough grease seep into it to be really good, but wasn't supersaturated as happens sometime.  

For the full review, http://thefatartery.blogspot.com/2011/03/dirty-martins-austin-tx.html

Serrano's - Austin, TX

Press play and continue on...

Yeah, Google Serranos and this is the first image that comes up.  Relation to the chile or restaurant?  I have no idea.

Now, I did find myself fascinated by this not-so-Mike-and-Carol family upon seeing this.  A true pioneer, sometime in the late 60s, this not-Mike managed to piece together a little slice of Mexico, an FLDS third-wife, a scary little future serial killer, and enough butterfly collars and bad haircuts to fill his little California bungalow and make a pitch to the networks.

Thankfully, ABC didn't pick it up.

And thankfully, these people weren't at Serrano's on Red River when I went there for fajitas on Tuesday night.

There was however, a drunk man in his 60s that sat down next to me who, after offering the bartender extra money to make his margarita not sweet, asked me if I wanted to share enchiladas with him, to which I politely declined indicating that I had already ordered.

Ok, let's back up a minute.  Found myself craving some fajitas the other night, and after driving by the packed parking lot at Polvo's, decided I'd try somewhere I hadn't been before.  Advertising itself as the home of Mesquite Grilled Fajitas, I decided to give Serrano's a shot, despite a misguided preconceived notion that this place was run-of-the-mill and probably not very good.  Now I've driven by the downtown location countless times, and always chalked it up as being one of those cool little spots with average food, that likely gets visitors more than locals, and might be a good spot for a bite and some margaritas, but not a place someone looking for great food would go.

Despite the downtown location, I was able to park right out front, and after helping a group of six ladies to understand that the reason the parking meter wasn't working was because it shut off two hours earlier, I ambled up the Austin stacked stone stairway, across the "amphitheater", where the Brady's or not-so-Brady's could play if the every did come, to the bar, where I ordered a margarita, chips and queso, and beef fajitas.

This is actually a cool little spot, which, on a day that's not 105 would be a nice setting to sit outside, particularly if they filled the little stone stage along the creek that flows through the place with mariachis.

So as I mentioned, I started with the chips and queso, which came out quickly and hot, thankfully, as it's congealation factor was an eight on the standard ten point scale.  Not spicy, but flavorful and creamy, this was a perfect starter, but the real winner was the salsa.  Red and chunky, almost a blend between fresh pico and standard salsa, it carried some serious heat, which I welcomed, and was also cool and refreshing.

I can't speak for the rest of the food there, but the fajitas hit the spot.  Upon their arrival, I was disappointed that, though served on an iron platter, they weren't sizzling, there was just a lone serrano pepper, and the onions looked raw, lacking that caramelization and continued cooking that I love so much.  The beef itself was lukewarm, and cooked medium to medium-well, but had great flavor.  Not so much the flavor of the heavily seasoned Polvo's meat, but more along the lines of the nice grill-flavored Habanero Cafe cuts.  Tortillas were clearly homemade, thin flour tortillas that were nearly see through and which were easily the hottest thing on the plate, which did well in transferring the refried beans, beef, onions, sour cream and pico de gallo from the plate to my mouth.  All in all, these were very good, including the onions, and the place gets bonus points for being and easy-in, easy-out fajita fix.

Nothing to write home about on the sides, standard rice, which I had a bite of but no more, and pureed refried pintos, carrying an oxygen-affected crust on the top.

Summary

Atmosphere:  old Austin, ample outdoor seating in a cool old setting, bar, good place to meet for a drink and a bite, good place for a group, decent place to sit and have a solo meal

Food:  Tex-Mex

Crowd:  drunk old man, family who demanded the Food Network be turned on minutes before leaving, couples, and families

Dog Friendly:  yes

Best Time to Go:  dinner on a cool night

What to Order for the First Timer:  beef fajitas

Texas Cuban - Austin, TX

Press play and continue on...

I'll sheepishly admit that swinging by the Texas Cuban trailer on South Lamar was not my destination, but became my destination once I found that Trey's Cuisine, where I hoped to try their mint and sweet soy marinated lamb kabob with feta Greek sauce, had closed for the afternoon given the extreme heat.

Not so at Texas Cuban, where I'm not quite sure if it was the oppressive Castro regime or the sole insanity of the owner that put the nice young man inside the tin sweat lodge at the peak of this 107 degree day hovering above a searing hot griddle and press making hot sandwiches for the few nuts who dared venture outside.  That said, it's nice to know that weather can't shut down some people, and I'm glad to say that for his effort and the quality of the food, I'll be back, rain, shine or hell-like heat conditions.

I ordered the El Cubano, which is a half of their signature sandwich, the Texas Cuban, which feeds two easily.  As he finished up the one other sandwich he was working on, and started on mine, I asked him how hot it was in the trailer, to which he replied, "a little cooler than outside, but probably around 95 or 100".

Dedication.

The sandwich was well worth the ten minute wait in the shaded, but still cruel, heat, though next time I'll be sure to call ahead with my order.  Not that I've had a lot of them, but this Cuban is absolutely the best of it's kind that I've ever had.  Juicy grilled pork tenderloin sliced in quarter inch thick medallions, topped with ham, swiss, provolone, pickles and mustard, pressed between an incredible garlic Cuban flat bread which retained it's outer crust and crunch on the ten minute drive home, despite being wrapped tightly in foil and bagged with some smoking hot, and perfectly cooked plantain chips, which, despite being labeled as chips, were actually half inch thick plantains smashed and deep fried to a perfect crisp on the outside with a moist and sweet inside, finished off with kosher salt.

I mean, damn.  This is an incredible sandwich.  And despite the assortment of hot sauces available outside of the trailer, I brought it home and dipped it in my favorite hot sauce for just such sandwiches, Matouk's Calypso Sauce, which is perfect for a sandwich as good as this.

I urge you to try this if you haven't, if at the very least just to reward a highly dedicated team determined to brave the weather to introduce us to one of Cuba's finest exports.

And after that nice Cuban music, I'll swing you to the other side of this trailer...

Summary:

Atmosphere:  Africa-hot, food trailer, shaded picnic tables

Food:  Cuban sandwiches

Crowd:  gluttons for punishment on this day

Dog Friendly:  yes

What to Order for the First Timer:  El Cubano

Best Time to Go:  Lunch

El Flaco - Austin, TX

Woke up yesterday with a craving for fajitas and figured I'd try a place that I haven't yet reviewed, so I headed over to Habanero Cafe down at South First and Oltorf, but as I thought might be the case, it was packed and there was a wait, so I hopped back in the car and wandered around until I noticed El Flaco, on South Congress, which I've never noticed before, and which looked a lot like the dirty little Tex-Mex place that I was feeling like.  

This place is likely often overlooked as just another far South Congress dive, but it ended up being a perfect spot to satisfy my fajita craving.  After pulling into the parking spot there in front of the newspapers, I backed back out and found another spot after reading the posted sign notifying me that the spot I was in was "Mr. Flaco Parking Only".  Must be the Mexican Burt Reynolds or something to get that kind of treatment.  

Not much for interiors or decor here, but who cares, it's about the food.  I was one of six people in the joint, two of which were heavily tatooed and dining alone, a couple who was discussing a friend's domestic dispute, and two other rather heavyset Latino women, all of us watching the news on the small little box tv hung in the corner of the joint.  

I ordered the beef Fajitas Rancheras, which axes the bell peppers in place of the much hotter serranos, and decided to start with some of their queso, which came out first with the obligatory chips and salsa.  The salsa was a great, hole-in-the-wall, red variety, with lots of heat and a liquid consistency.  Very good with the warm, salted chips which came in a basket of translucent wax paper soaking up the excess.

Queso was pretty simple, and, well, let me just give you the recipe based on what my fine palate was able to decipher.

2 parts government issued cheese

1 part Elmer's wood glue

1 chopped pickled jalapeno

This stuff was THICK, and lasted about three minutes before becoming a solid paste which set the spoon such that you could lift the bowl off the table with it.  That said, it was good, but I limited myself as I could literally feel it catching and sticking to my ribs on the way down.  Combining it with the salsa was a nice means of keeping it more liquid-like as well as giving it some needed kick.

Fajitas.  Let's do this recipe too.

1.  Chop onions, serrano, peppers, and tomatoes.

2.  Marinate and slice skirt steak.

3.  Heat up cast iron fajita plate to somewhere between 100,000 and 110,000 degrees, throw steps one and two on it, garnish with cilantro, and serve.  

  

Seriously, this thing came out so hot that even after I was done eating my first fajita, it was still going strong, strewing off loads of smoke, and charring everything on the bottom to a crisp, giving it all a nice caramelization and fantastic flavor.  The first department must have this place marked on a map on its wall with a "Do Not Respond" note, and Mr. Flaco must have some pull with the local Fire Marshall in order to not have smoke detectors in this place.  

The meat was fantastic, heavily seasoned throughout and cooked to order, with the serranos providing really good heat.  The taco was cooled down to a comfortable temperature to eat once put on the hot flour tortillas with chunky, day-glo green homemade guacamole and pico de gallo, making it a fantastic combination that I'll be back for soon.  

Portions were perfect for lunch, with enough meat, vegetables and tortillas to get you three nice-sized tacos, without giving you the "I just ate a massive Mexican meal for lunch and need a siesta before heading back to the office".  Charro beans were a nice flavorful side, while the rice was run-of-the-mill and an unnecessary filler.

Great place to pop in for a quick and good lunch if you don't mind smelling like a line cook for the next few hours.  

Summary:

Atmosphere:  dirty Tex-Mex hole-in-the-wall, good for lunch, good for a hangover, good for dinner, good for carry out, outdoor seating, no bar seating

Food:  classic Tex-Mex

When to Go:  lunch, dinner

Dog Friendly:  yes

Crowd:  combination of WT and real Mexicans

What to Order for the First Timer:  beef Fajitas Rancheras

Little Thai Food - Austin, TX

Well it's overcast and only 86 degrees out today, so I took that opportunity to hit a food trailer for lunch today, and settled on Little Thai Food, on South 1st.

Great atmosphere for a food trailer, and really nice people running it.  Set on the east side of South 1st just north of the Trailer Park Eatery, this place has ample seating with colorfully painted picnic tables, set along the edge of a nice little creek/greenbelt (though I'm not sure which one) in the shade of large, mature trees.  In addition to the quality of the setting and the food, the service is nice if you're dining with them, and after ordering you take a seat and they bring your food out to you with the necessary utensils.

I opted for the Pad Ka Prow today with pork, which is thinly sliced pork stir-fried with basil, bell peppers, onions, mushrooms, thai chiles and a brown sauce.

It was awesome.  The pork was tender with hints of caramelization on the edges, the vegetables were cooked but still crisp also with nice brown on them, and the mushrooms still had some tooth to them, not having been cooked to the point of being limp.  The chiles and the brown sauce combined for a flavorful and tasty seasoning for the dish, as well as something nice to drag the rice through with each bite.

The rice was also good, perfectly cooked so that it held together enough for you to cut a piece off to eat with the sauce and meat and vegetables, not dry in the least or difficult to control on the fork or with chopsticks.

My only knock with this place is the same as with every single Thai place I've been to.  Despite reputations, and my asking them to make it "as hot as they possibly can", it barely tingled the tongue.  That said, great flavor and a great meal at a good price ($6.50), and I'll be going back to give some of the curry and noodle dishes a shot soon.

Summary:

Atmosphere:  one of the nicer food trailer setups out there, along the banks of a creek, with ample seating for large and small parties, good for lunch, good for a family, good for a group, good place to meet on a nice day, good for carry out

Food:  Thai

Dog Friendly:  yes

When to Go:  lunch, dinner

Crowd:  couple of other white people, but I was there after the lunch crowd

What to Order for the First Timer:  TBD, but I recommend the only thing I've had there so far, the Pad Ka Prow

P Terry's - Austin, TX

The famous In-N-Out Burger is making its way to Texas, but I don't really care, because in Austin, we've got P Terry's, a quintessential coastal California-style drive-thru burger joint serving up burgers and fries similar too, but perhaps even better than those at the noted California chain.  I'll wait for a side by side for final judgment, but know that it has got to be close.

P Terry's has a few locations in Austin, but the one that I am familiar with a frequent pretty regularly is the one just south of Town Lake on South Lamar.  A true drive-thru, this place is slightly larger than a breadbox, with windows on either side, one for conducting business, and one for receiving morsels of goodness wedged in a bun.  The walk up business is great too, with a small, almost hidden outdoor seating area, which might be alright on a nice day, but you're not going to see me there in the heat of summer.

Saturday I arrived shortly after noon and was behind eight to ten cars, but it took less than fifteen minutes to get my food and be on my way.  Shockingly, in that span I heard Florence and the Machine's Dog Days are Over on the radio not once, but twice (different stations at least).

Anyway, not a lot to choose from here, but that's just fine with me, it means they do what they do well, and they get it done quick.  Burger, double, with cheese or without, or a veggie burger.  Fries.  Standards included, crisp iceberg lettuce, local organic tomatoes, and their special sauce, an In-N-Out like version of Thousand Island, which is incredible.

I chose the double, and added onions, which I strongly recommend.

So these burgers aren't big, so I do recommend a double, both for filling you up and also, it's the absolute perfect meat to bread ratio.  These are thin patties, and the kind that nearly melt together, the same consistency throughout, made of fresh local, grass-fed beef, with great flavor and juiciness...like In-N-Out, fresh, never frozen.  The cheese is high quality Processed In The USA variety that envelops the meat but seems to know to stop short of wilting the vegetables.  Tomatoes are advertised as local and organic, and I'm fairly certain if they contained any bit of green or yellow, you wouldn't see them on your sandwich.  Lettuce is the thick, hand torn from the head kind, which remarkably retains its crispness and temperature on the way home despite being wrapped in wax paper with the hot meat and cheese.  Onions.  Wow, the onions are great, and I urge you to add them to your burger.  Chopped white onions.  Crisp.  Cold.  Pungent.  Lend incredible texture and flavor to an incredible sandwich.

On to the fries.  Again like In-N-Out, cut fresh on site.  Know how I know?

Oh, and they are DE-LISH.  That's right.

So these have a nice, fresh flavor and are cooked to order and served piping hot and lightly salted.  They're of the soggy, but not too much, variety, lacking the outside crispiness but making up for it in flavor.

Good stuff.  This is a weekend spot for sure.  Only thing missing is hitting the beach right afterwards.  But wait, there's Barton Springs...even better.  Finish off your fattening with a refreshing dip in the natural spring, and as you're FLOATING on the top of the crystal clear water, be sure to thank P Terry for the start to a great Saturday.

Summary

Atmosphere:  burger stand, drive-thru, outdoor seating

Food:  burgers and fries

Dog Friendly:  yes

Time to Go:  lunch

Crowd:  jerseys, loafers, bad blouses

What to Order for the First Timer:  double cheeseburger with everything and onions, fries

Perla's - Austin, TX

I love this place.

Great seafood.  Great raw bar.  Great bar.  Great cocktails.  Great outdoor seating.  Great place for dinner.

Now, with a thesaurus...

Great seafood.  Splendiferous raw bar.  Swell bar.  Hunky-dory cocktails.  Marvelous outdoor seating.  Fabulous place for dinner.

In the second half of 2010 (2H2010 for you corporate folks) when I was commuting to Austin weekly and staying with friends down off of South Congress, I frequented this place for dinner quite a bit whenever I was feeling like seafood or a relatively healthy meal.  Also, it's a fantastic place to have a solo dinner, with a spacious bar, knowledgeable bartenders, and other solo diners sitting at the bar ready to have a conversation.

The menu is huge, comprised almost entirely of seafood, split up into sections for the raw bar, which features no less than twelve different types of oysters on the half shell, appetizers, salads and soups, simple a la carte fish, seafood and non-seafood plates, sandwiches, and sides.  The bartenders and waiters can tell you anything and everything about everything on the menu, and can help to get you the right meal for you.

My Lovely Wife Mrs. Gordo and I hit up Perla's for an early dinner last night for some drinks and some food to share, which is a great way to experience this place as it allows you to try several things.  We arrived right around 5:30pm, which was clearly too late to get a table outside on this fantastic day, but in time to get $0.50 off oysters (each one) and some discounted drinks at their happy hour.  I'd say there are twenty or more tables outside underneath the shade of awnings and a massive oak, and in addition is an outdoor "bar" to sit at, not an actual bar but a long, skinny concrete table which is perfect for bellying up, be you flying solo or on a date.  So with the outside packed, we found two spots at the bar inside, which is my favorite place to sit for a meal here.

We started with some oysters on the half shell, and after talking with the bartender about the various oysters on the menu, decided on the Salutation Cove Oysters from Prince Edward Island.  Shucked at the bar and served on a bed of crushed ice with a couple of lemon wedges, these were medium sized, slightly briny though not as salty as those from the northeast, and very good.  They serve them with sides of cocktail sauce, horseradish, and vinegar/onion mignonette, all perfect complements and perfect acidity to cut through the oysters.

From the oysters we moved on to the Salt and Jalapeno Pepper Fried Calamari with Green Sauce and Marinara, which is one of the better renditions of fried calamari I've had.  Not greasy at all, the rings and tentacles come out dry and crispy on the outside, plump and perfectly tender on the inside, and are mixed together with fried strips of mild peppers and okra.  Both sauces are excellent, with the green sauce being a simple, smooth and creamy salsa verde with an adequate amount of heat, and the marinara being homemade with chunks of tomato and onion, served warm.

Our raw and deep fried boxes checked, we moved over to the Fresh & Simple Market Seafood section and debated between the steamed North Atlantic halibut, the pan roasted Texas coast grouper, and halibut cheeks, which were littered amongst eight to ten other simply prepared fish selections.  Just for the halibut, we went for the halibut cheeks with a side of potato griddle cakes.

Let me start with the griddle cakes.  These things are fantastic.  Very thinly shredded potatoes, presumably with egg, cream, and mild seasoning, formed into one inch thick patties and fried before being topped with sour cream and chives.  Crispy on the outside, creamy on the inside with just a hint of tooth from the potatoes.  I strongly recommend this as a side to whatever you're having.

On to the halibut, and first an educations.  These beauties are halibut cheeks:

They cut them out of this ugly sucker, pan roast these delicate morsels, resulting in a paper-thin, lightly browned and crispy crust, and a tender, mildly flavored, and incredibly delicate interior.  With these simple preparations, you get a broiled lemon for squeezing, an herbed breadcrumb stuffed roma tomato, and a choice of garlic drawn butter, salsa verde, red chimichurri or homemade tartar as a sauce.  I highly recommend the red chimichurri, a take on the standard South American condiment based on oil, herbs and garlic, with this one adding what tasted like oven dried tomatoes, lending a great sweetness to the dish.  It's incredible, and a perfect sauce for the fish, though it can stand on its own just fine.

As I have a tendency to do, I'm going to digress.  I've had fat cheeks my whole life.  Growing up I was sent to the principal's office on more than one occasion for dipping in class, which I wasn't.  I've been asked by cigar store employees what brand I'm chewing, which I also wasn't.  But my favorite story comes after a late night of drinking, and a even later night of food poisoning.  We had this tiny diner that we'd go to after the bars in school called the Pitt Grill, next to the Days Inn (that reminds me, what does La Quinta mean in English?  mull it over, we'll get back to it), which was run by a massive and generally angry lady who would let us get behind the counter and do what we pleased with the griddle, the stove, the deep fryer and the toaster, leading us to some awesome late night meals and second degree burns before turning in for the night.  On one such occasion they had just gotten in a batch of spoiled eggs, which we only found out a few hours later when my roommate and I both woke up in cold sweats with our bodies doing everything in their power to expel the tainted goods.  After spending most of the night on the bathroom floor waiting for the health center to open up, we finally made it over to see the doctor.  While my roommate vomited continuously in the waiting area, I went in to see the doctor, an old army doctor who must of at some point taken some shrapnel to the head, and explained what happened, citing specifically the undercooked and underrefrigerated eggs, my symptoms as well as my roommates, and that I've had food poisoning before.  After a careful study of my body and head, this genius put his hand to his chin and this thinking cap on, thought about it for two or three minutes before informing me that nope, I didn't have food poisoning, I had a full on case of the mumps.

"Are you kidding me?" I asked.  "Why the hell do you think I have the mumps?  My roommate ate the same thing as me last night and is out in the hall vomiting right now."

His answer was simple.  "Your cheeks have very serious swelling."

(I digress from my digression here.  Answer:  nexttodennys.  YEAH!  I'll be here all week, folks.)

Anyway I asked for a mirror, took a look at him, and informed him that's how I looked every morning when I wake up and look in the mirror, but he didn't believe me and asked if he could call my roommate in from the hallway to attest, which he did.  As soon as he asked the question about my cheeks, my roommate looked at me as if to say, "is this guy for real", then vomited in the trash can he brought in with him from the hallway, then said "yeah, his cheeks look like that all the time", and then vomited again.

What could the doctor do at that point but offer a second opinion?  "OK, you have food poisoning."

Thanks.  True story.  Don't get me started on health care overhaul.

Anyway, all that said, here's my best halibut impression.

Did that ruin your day?

Summary

Atmosphere:  casual/trendy fish house and raw bar, great bar to sit at, great cocktails, great people watching, great if you're flying solo, fantastic outdoor seating and lots of it, outdoor "bar" to sit at, great place for a date, great place for a group

Food:  seafood, some of the very best in town

Dog Friendly:  indeed

When to Go:  happy hour, dinner

Crowd:  businessmen, 20somethings, 30somethings, tourists, hotchicks, groups of girls, groups of guys, groups of girls and guys, scantily clads, solo diners, seafood lovers

What to Order for the First Timer:  oysters on the half shell, whatever pan roasted white fish they have with red chimichurri, griddle cakes