Thanks for asking. I picked up some friends, a couple .45s, and an AK-47 and headed down to Lockhart, the barbecue capital of Texas, where we had lunch at one of the oldest barbecue joints in the state, but not before honing our skills on the war on terror out in the country...
Well, our culinarily-skilled friend managed to assassinate the deranged librarian and bitchy girlfriend holding one of our friends hostage, but unfortunately also managed to pump more than a few rounds into our buddy's chest in the process.
Looks like we'll just be three for lunch. Terrorists 1, Idiots 0
Our card carrying NRA friend gave us pause with his grouping...
And yours truly took out Public Enemy #1, the deranged librarian, with one shot, which is all it takes...
That's right. Terrorists 2, Idiots 1. Crap. We still lost.
Anyway, on to Smitty's for a quick tour...
And our order...
So you can see what we got, some pork ribs, some brisket, fat and lean, sausage, and the end cut of a smoked prime rib. Served as usual on nothing more than butcher paper with some bread, we also got the standard sides of cheese, onions, jalapenos, pickles, slaw, and potato salad.
I bounce back and forth on the central Texas barbecue spots each time I come down, and today we had a good day at Smitty's. The brisket had incredible bark and a nice smoke flavor, with a good amount of fat throughout which melted with each bite making the brisket tender and flavorful. My recommendation is to forego the sauce (we did) and put it on some bread with some hot sauce, onion and a hunk of cheese. Makes a great barbecue taco, and today's was just that, great.
The ribs were excellent as well. Finished with a wet mop of sauce while still in the smoker, these bad boys lack the crust that the brisket exhibits, but not the flavor. They're not fall off the bone tender, but are tender nonetheless and take some teeth to get it off the bone, but by no means is it chewy or tough.
I've always been a little skeptical of the sausage both here down the street at Kreuz. It's a mushy beef and pork mixture tighly packed into a ring, which appears only to have salt and pepper flavoring and unfortunately tends to come out rather bland. How do you solve a problem of bland sausage? Onion, jalapeno, bread, and hot sauce.
Now, I'd never gotten the prime rib before....ohhhhhhh, the prime rib...medium rare in the center, and a fatty tender outer ring laced intertwined with melting fat and filled with smoked goodness. They also must have known we were ridding the world of terrorists, as they took a brand new rack out and cut us the end piece, giving us plenty of crusty edge and smoke flavor.
Sides. Hell, I'm not even going to talk about them. Get the cheese, onion, and jalapenos, but save room for the meat and don't fill up on slaw, beans or potato salad.
I'll also hold off on the atmosphere, as the video should speak for itself.
Go. Enjoy. And save room for either Kreuz, Black's, or Chisolm Trail while you're down there. Why stop at one when you can stop at two or more?
Summary
Atmosphere: hundred year old meat market, good for a road trip, good for groups, good for dogooders ridding the world of its problems
Food: barbecue, and one of the best at that
Dog Friendly: likely not.
When to Go: lunch, after librarian kills
Crowd: locals, families
What to Get for the First Timer: fatty brisket, pork ribs, AND prime rib, with cheese, bread and onions
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